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And that’s just her public persona—at home, she’s fantastic in bed, a spectacular cook, loving, selfless, and devoted. He’s immersed in a fierce battle between his superhuman standards and his terror of being 40 and single—because 40 and single is not supposed to be part of The Total Package’s story.
Oh and she also speaks French, plays tennis, sings beautifully, reads voraciously and she’s a history buff. As long as anyone can remember, The New Lease On Life Guy had been dating his longterm girlfriend.
Through high school, college and his twenties, he was always The Guy With A Girlfriend.
He spent years enjoying pitying his single friends, and somehow, he’s now 30 and single.
He appreciates all the unsolicited support, but he also thinks it would be pretty great if everyone stopped thinking there was something wrong with him.
The opposite of the previous guy, The Aggressively Online Dating Guy Who Can’t Believe He’s Not Married Yet can’t believe he’s not married yet.
He’s not really sure how to be single but he’s goddamn happy he is, and he’s sure as hell going out tonight.
There was a field that needed to be played, and he broke up with his girlfriend when he was 24.The Misogynist’s close cousin is The Perpetual Cheater. Back in the day, The Guy Who Peaked Too Early had everything a 17-year-old girl could ever dream of.His sky-high confidence carried him smoothly through college, and no one was surprised when he landed a smart, sweet, beautiful girlfriend in his early 20s.He never seemed that happy in the relationship, but everyone just assumed they would eventually get married.Now, after a long and difficult breakup, The New Lease On Life Guy has reemerged with a bang and is suddenly acting like he just got called down on The Price Is Right.
Now it’s seven years later, his hair got bored and left, and his high school lacrosse glory isn’t part of the conversation that much these days.